18. Drink Less January (Terms Apply)

Dry January? Not exactly.

In this episode of Wrong Way Forward, Katy and Justin take on Drink Less January (Terms Apply)—the loopholes, the pressure, the weight talk, and the minefield of trying to “encourage” healthier habits without blowing up your relationships.

From Dear Abby disasters to GLP-1s, football exemptions, and why unsolicited honesty is rarely helpful, this episode asks the real question:

Is it accountability… or are you just being an ass?

#WrongWayForward
 #DrinkLessJanuary
 #TermsApply
 #DryJanuaryish
 #NewYearsResolutions
 #BadAdvice
 #RelationshipTalk
 #PodcastHumor

Transcript

Hello And New Year Catch‑Up

Speaker 0:00

She's Katy Montgomery. He's Justin Joseph. These best friends are serving subpoenas to bad advice weekly with Wrong Way Forward. Now here's Katy and Justin.

Katy Montgomery 0:11

Hi everybody and welcome to Wrong Way Forward. My name is Katy Montgomery, and I am here with my best friend Justin Joseph. And we're very excited because this is our um second um show as part of episode two. Um and we're just excited to be here. And Justin, happy new year, like a real happy new year. This is our first like face-to-face big conversation we've had since we've both been away for the break.

Justin Joseph 0:37

I know it's exciting to see you. Happy New Year

Japan Trip And Post‑Holiday Slump

Justin Joseph 0:39

to you. It's also the longest period that since we started working on the podcast, what probably a year ago, this is the longest period you and I went without speaking because you, of course, were over in Japan. How was all of that?

Katy Montgomery 0:50

It was wonderful. I do have to say, the last time I was in Japan, I was 30 years old. Um, it's almost 22 years later, and I have to say it would have been nice to maybe um schedule in a day of rest. Um, it is sensory overload, it is so exciting, it is sound sights, people, crowds. Um, Tokyo is just so full of life. Um, it was a fantastic trip. But I have to say, you know, the new year is always weird. I I have two feelings about it. Like I dread getting back into the swing of things, and there's a part of me that is just craving a schedule and routine and control. And so it's this kind of yin and yang kind of thing.

Justin Joseph 1:33

So would you go so far as to call it seasonal depression? I I think I have that because as the I mean, once Christmas is over, I mean once New Year's New Year's Day is over, everything comes down.

unknown 1:43

Yeah.

Justin Joseph 1:44

I mean, I it needs to go back, I want to get back into life.

Katy Montgomery 1:47

I yeah, I don't know if it's seasonal or if it's because of the weather. I think for me, it's like getting out of the routine. I start to feel really lethargic and I want to go back to feeling kind of active and engaged. But then I've been out of it for so long that I'm starting to get comfortable in being a lump on the log. And so it's it's it's fighting internally within

Anxiety, Football, And Dry January

Katy Montgomery 2:11

myself.

Justin Joseph 2:11

And then all the things we're gonna talk about today are resolutions. Then you've got also the pressure of knowing that you've committed to certain things and that you and you've told everyone that you've committed to certain things, and the pressure of performing on those is a whole different dimension. And like for real estate, it's a hamster wheel because you know you're measured by your volume every year. And so as of December 31st, my tracking goes back to zero and I start over.

Katy Montgomery 2:33

So are you anxious, Justin?

Justin Joseph 2:35

Very didn't we talk about this? Didn't I? What's an episode two where I said I don't have anxiety? No, I'm not anxious because I've got a lot of stuff in the pipeline and I think I've got a good positive start to the new year. But I just I love the holidays, I really do. But once January comes around, January and February, once football season's over, I love football season and we're getting Broncos are in playoffs, Super Bowl coming up. Once that's over, I want to die. Like until St. Patrick's Day.

Speaker 1 3:02

Well, we also should probably tell the audience you're doing dry January. So that's probably putting you in a little bit of an impressive state to Yeah, I do more like drink less January.

Justin Joseph 3:12

I really drink less quarter one. So I mean, you know, it's like I said, it's really hard to watch a football game without having a drink, especially if it's stressful.

Speaker 1 3:21

Yes.

Justin Joseph 3:21

Um, but we are, you know, I need to, I mean, I gained six pounds over the holidays. I've I I hit a number on the scale I've never actually hit before. Thank God there was not a two in front of it, but it was really right there. Um, we were dancing with two, and so um

Weight Gain And Resetting The Year

Justin Joseph 3:35

anyway, I'm gonna indict for I'm back down under 190, which is very good. And so good, good.

Katy Montgomery 3:40

Well, I think that leads us, you know, it was so funny. Every year, People magazine, their New Year's issue, it puts two people on the cover and they both lost 100 pounds. So that really takes us into New Year's resolutions, which a big one for most people is to lose weight. And it tends to be the one that is the most difficult to stick with, to stay with. Um, but this year I did something a little bit different. Um, and so I was gonna kind of walk you through that, Justin. I think this might work for you um in the future. And I, my sister and I sat down and did this over a steak dinner and many cocktails and wine. But um,

Resolutions Framework: Masagi, Adventures, Habits

Katy Montgomery 4:20

we both committed, wrote it out, and it is gonna be prominently displayed on my refrigerator so I can see it at all times.

Justin Joseph 4:27

On that note, do you do a vision board? Do you what do you think about vision boards? I can't believe how many people do them. But you're you're basically talking about one on your fridge.

Speaker 1 4:37

No, this is handwritten. I don't go and cut up magazines and you have a vision board on your fridge with magnets.

Katy Montgomery 4:45

Justin, you know, this is when people and it's gonna be really interesting for our listeners when we get to block B, and they actually realize how supportive you are on people trying to set goals.

Speaker 3 4:57

So you're pretending vision board of the fridge, you're putting up these things going. I didn't mean to.

Katy Montgomery 5:01

So I caught um a clip on Instagram, and y'all know that I've reduced my social media, and I'll give you an update on that in just a little bit. Um, but this is a guy named Jesse Itzler. Um, and how I know him is that he's married um to Sarah Blakely, who founded Spanx. Justin, do you know what Spanx is?

Justin Joseph 5:21

Yes, I have several pairs of thank you very much.

Katy Montgomery 5:27

Yes. Um but he's an entrepreneur in his own right. I think you know that. He was involved with like marquee jets and Zico. Um, um, what's it called? Coconut water. Um, he's done a number of things, but he has three approaches to the new year. And one is a Japanese term, which is called musagi. And the idea is this is your defining thing for 2026. This is not the kind of, you know, I'm gonna meditate each day or, you know, I'm gonna um, you know, take care of this small goal. This is the one big thing you're going to do. So, Justin, for us, 2025 could have been start a podcast. Like it is a significant commitment that you can look back and say, 2025 was the year I did X. I

Steps Goal, Social Media Brick, Planning Adventures

Katy Montgomery 6:15

love that. And so for me, and I'm just gonna kind of put this up to the camera so people can kind of see what I am posting on my fridge. Um, my tell me what that is.

Justin Joseph 6:25

So people for people who may be listening and can't see that.

Katy Montgomery 6:27

So the it's my piece of paper, and the first thing is my um defining thing for 2026.

Justin Joseph 6:34

Okay, that's your masagi.

Katy Montgomery 6:35

That's my masagi, yes. And then his next idea is that as adults, we need to kind of schedule in time to look forward to. And so he talks about having six mini adventures roughly every two weeks, every two months. And the idea is that can be camping with your kids, a concert with your husband. That could be a girls' trip to the beach, but it's something to look forward to and to have planned so you won't have the excuse that you are not going to do this event.

Justin Joseph 7:08

So is a mix is a mini adventure a trip or doesn't it doesn't have to be?

Katy Montgomery 7:11

It could be a mini adventure is just something to look forward to. So it could be an event, a concert, throwing a party, it could be a trip, um, it could be, you know, a day out, but it's something that is scheduled and planned and that is very specific.

Justin Joseph 7:27

Okay. And you don't have to do all these at the beginning of the year, or you just, or do you? You should know what your six adventures are.

Katy Montgomery 7:33

I think the idea is to know what your six adventures are so you can place them in the calendar. So as the year slogs along, you've got something to look forward to. So when January starts, you're like, oh, in the beginning of March, you know, my sister's gonna fly up and we're gonna go see this play, right? In two months, I'm gonna head to Denver and I'm gonna watch Justin piss off every waitress and waiter in Denver.

Justin Joseph 7:56

I'm gonna be driven crazy by my new dog. She's nuts. She's lovely, but she's nuts. Of course she's nuts.

Katy Montgomery 8:04

And then his last thing is spending one quarter, you know, so you have four quarters, you know, kind of uh through the year, or no, four quarters, excuse me, three quarters throughout the year, but having a winning habit kind of every quarter, something that you focus on. This could be picking up a habit of journaling every day. This could be picking up a habit of waking up 30 minutes earlier every day. And I liked this because it gave me a mix of different things that I could look forward to. And so my defining theme for 2026 is going to be very odd, and some people won't think it's much of a stretch. But last year I made the goal to walk 12,000 steps a day. I love that. And some people will think, well, whatever, Katy, you know, that's nothing. 12,000 steps a day for me was something. If I was on an airplane, if I was stuck behind a desk all day, if I was sick, um, if I just didn't fill up to it, you know, and it's something where, you know, in Denver, I had to have to actively get out and do something.

Speaker 3 9:04

You would too.

Katy Montgomery 9:05

And so this year, my defining thing um is I'm gonna try to do 12,500 steps every day.

Speaker 1 9:13

Okay.

Katy Montgomery 9:13

And it's just making kind of a commitment. My six mini adventures have already been planned.

Speaker 1 9:19

Okay.

Katy Montgomery 9:20

Um, and then my winning habit every quarter. I think some of y'all know that I've spoken about trying to stop my reliance on social media. And I bought this thing called a brick. I'm showing it to everyone. Um, it's crazy. I have probably been since January 1st on social media, and it's now what, January 8th? A whole collective of maybe not even an hour.

Justin Joseph 9:44

I love that. What's so funny about the brick is I was I was I'm putting a new listing on this week, and he had stuff all over his fridge, and that's one of the no-nos.

Break And Listener CTA

Justin Joseph 9:52

I immediately take everything off. And he's this, he's a bachelor, and he just like basically just I'll leave, just do whatever you want to the house. So I ripped all his stuff off his refrigerator, and then there was something called the brick. And normally, had I not known from you, I would have thrown that out. But I was like, I know what that is, I'm not gonna touch that.

Katy Montgomery 10:09

It is, and so what I find is it's not overwhelming. There's one kind of great thing for the year, and I have found that that I'm was really proud that I hit that kind of goal last year. So it's something that I can talk about and know that I accomplished. I love the winning habit kind of every quarter, and I love the idea of six mini adventures. So that's a twist that I'm gonna be doing on New Year's resolutions this year. And I thought my sister going through this exercise was really interesting because I had been thinking about it

Sticking To Resolutions And Tools

Katy Montgomery 10:39

since I saw the post. But she was something it wasn't until we sat down and actually did the exercise, and it really brought up a lot of things about that she had not thought about that she wanted to do, things that she didn't know kind of how to articulate, things that were in the back of her brain that weren't coming to the front of her brain. And so it's it's a really it's a it's a great concept. So that's me in New Year's resolutions. I'd I'd love to hear Justin. What are you doing?

Justin Joseph 11:04

Well, let's talk about it on the other side. But just to recap for um our listeners again, number one is the Musagi, and that is the big the big adventure. That that's the maybe you should recap.

Katy Montgomery 11:15

Musagi is the defining thing for 2026.

Justin Joseph 11:19

Defining thing for 2026. That's A. Okay. What's B?

Katy Montgomery 11:22

B is six mini adventures that you are gonna kind of schedule. And then the last one is trying to establish a winning habit every quarter.

Justin Joseph 11:30

I think those are super cool. And um, on the other side, we'll talk about some ideas I have, and we'll talk about how you um how you deal with your loved ones and their uh New Year's resolutions when that when you when they're either the same or different, how much pressure do you put on them to keep them in? We'll talk about all that on the other side. We'll be right back.

Katy Montgomery 11:48

You've been listening to Wrong Way Forward, where bad advice goes to die, and then gets resurrected just so we can roast it again.

Justin Joseph 11:56

If you're enjoying the chaos, hit like and subscribe and come back every Thursday for new episodes.

Katy Montgomery 12:01

Have a new topic or some disastrously bad advice you want to dissect, email wrongwayforwardpodcast at gmail.com. Include your contact info.

Speaker 12:11

Now back to Wrong Way Forward. Roasting the worst advice ever. Welcome back to the Katy and Justin Podcast.

Justin Joseph 12:17

Hi, everybody. Welcome back to Wrong Way Forward. Uh, you know, by some point, usually I think I I was watching something the other day and they said there's a day in which you can stop, you have to stop saying happy new year to people. I forget what the what the rule was, but I think we're past that now. There's also a day by which you have to stop talking about New Year's resolutions. And so we're still under that rule. And so this will be our last discussion on it. Maybe we'll do a check-in in a few months, but today we're talking about, I mean, before we at the end of last season, we talked about how you make New Year's resolutions. Now we're talking about what they are and how you stick by them and some different ideas of how you can approach them. And so um, when we left, Katy was talking about what's the is there a name for

Weight, GLP‑1s, And Aging Bodies

Justin Joseph 12:55

that guy's the three things?

Katy Montgomery 12:57

You know, I think he's just pulled together from different places.

Justin Joseph 13:01

Yeah, interesting. And I was just looking at his Instagram. He looks like he invented the big ass calendar.

Speaker 1 13:05

Yes, correct.

Justin Joseph 13:06

I saw an advertisement for that on, I think, on Instagram as well. Um, anyway, um, so we were talking about some things, and you know, for me, for me, my big New Year's resolution is weight. I'm as big as I've ever been, and it it's never really bothered me, except as I age, it's just another thing that weighs on me literally and figuratively.

Speaker 1 13:25

And so um Justin, but you do like spanks, so that can help.

Justin Joseph 13:30

Yeah, you know, but spanks I find, I and I wear them if I'm putting on a tux, but men's spanks, and I'll stand for this, they're like underwear, and then they go, they have this really rigid thing that covers here and it squeezes you in. But the problem is, is then your fat rolls out here.

Katy Montgomery 13:44

And so Justin, welcome to the life of a woman.

Justin Joseph 13:48

Yeah, and so I don't really get the point of them except that they kind of flatten your stomach, but then you, like I said, and then if you sit down and that's a disaster, it's just they're more work than they're worth. And then I have a shirt that's a compression shirt, and that thing I feel like I'm having a heart attack in, and I cannot wait to get that off. Anyway, so I don't wear them as much as I used to, but um, the weight thing is a big one for me. I've got to get down no mostly not because of just vanity, it's literally health. I've got to get down, I'd say 20 to 30 pounds. And you know what was funny, I was watching New Year's Eve with Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper. And Andy Cohn, I I I've never even looked twice at him. He dropped 25 pounds last year. He has never looked better.

Katy Montgomery 14:27

Yes, have you seen him results? But you know, here's the thing that I think about all the time. And again, you know, someone who's struggled with their weight, when you are, you know, well to do and you have a trainer and you know, you're in a public role. I mean, he should be very proud of losing his weight. But I mean, that's a lot easier than like living in a food desert, you know, under the poverty level, you know. Well, 100%. Walking two shifts where the cortisol is is high.

Justin Joseph 14:55

I just think nothing ages you as a man, nothing ages you more than weight. I I just I I felt that in myself than watching Andy Cohn the other night. And by the way, I just think he's really talented. I've never really spent any time with him.

Katy Montgomery 15:06

Oh, he's super talented. But I have to tell you this for every beautiful woman I know, I could say most. I mean, usually the female looks way better than the male. I mean, like, you know, what do you mean? Because I think here's the thing.

Justin Joseph 15:20

Female looks better with weight.

Katy Montgomery 15:22

No, a female just looks better. Like, here's the thing like, guys can be like bald and fat and get a cute, amazing girl. That's not the same. You know, if if if a woman had alopecia and extra 20 pounds, good luck.

Justin Joseph 15:35

Yeah, she'd be wearing a wig.

Katy Montgomery 15:37

You never know. They probably itch, Justin.

Justin Joseph 15:41

I know. We had an anchor here on television who went through that. And so anyway, um, but anyway, weight is big for me, both because of vanity and because of literal health reasons. I just need to get it off. And so I got back on the GLP one. Um, and like I said, I've already down six pounds, which again, my girlfriend Kelly will say it's she can be she can work out for a month and I can work out for a month, I'll drop 15 pounds or 10 pounds and she'll drop three pounds. She says girls girls' bodies are different, which I don't really get. I mean, I get it, but I don't really get it. Um anyway, so the weight is a big one for me. I am doing drink less really January, February, March. I just need to, you know, that's part of the big weight thing. And then just refocusing at work, I realized I think we talked about last year, I had a really tough last quarter in real estate, a really tough year. It was a tough year in the industry. And so um it's the first year that I I don't want to say burnt out, but I felt burnt out. And you know, I didn't really get the December off I wanted to. It was busy in December, which is a good problem to have. And so, anyway, long story short, um, that's where I'm thinking. But I am gonna put some

Dear Abby: Can I Urge My Partner To Lose Weight?

Justin Joseph 16:42

thought into the three things you talk about. I love the um big idea, I love the adventures, and I really we're going to Europe here shortly, and we really have nothing else planned. We have we, as you know, we didn't do anything in December because we have the new puppy and we were focusing on training her. And I had Jomo. Have you heard Jomo? Joy of Missing Out.

Speaker 1 17:00

Oh, yeah. No, but that that makes sense to me.

Justin Joseph 17:05

I had Jomo. I mean, we turned on all parties, and I was really thrilled with it. Having said that, as it went on and every started doing all their fun trips, you, all my friends, I'm like, okay, I should be trapped.

Speaker 1 17:14

There you go.

Justin Joseph 17:15

So that's the end of that. But one of the things we're going to talk about is how you deal with friends and family or partners and their resolutions. And um, there was an article that we're gonna take on this week. Um, from who's this? This is from Dear Abby. It says, Can I encourage a healthier lifestyle for my partner? The question was this Dear Abby, in the past I always disliked my appearance. I've been obese most of my 70 years, but I'm now within 20 pounds of my ideal weight. My problem is I have met someone who I like very much and could see spending the rest of my life with. However, she is obese and it bothers me greatly. How can I effectively communicate my desire that she lose 30 to 50 pounds without being offensive? And this is what Abby writes back. Dear finally, Slim. Approaching someone and saying that you want them to lose 30 to 50 pounds would be like touching the third rail. And I don't really know what that means. You'll have to explain, I'm sure you probably do. You can, however, as you get to know this person better, monitor your healthy lifestyle, encourage her by setting an example. If she picks it up, she may be the lady for you. You know, I don't think that's the right way forward. What are your thoughts? What

Kindness Versus Honesty In Relationships

Justin Joseph 18:15

are your thoughts?

Katy Montgomery 18:15

I mean, I think generally the wrong way forward when you're trying to encourage anyone to do something is mandating, embarrassment, shame, ass writing. I mean, that doesn't work. I mean, there is study upon study that has shown this. Also, we know this, and I'm guilty of this myself. If I lose some weight and have a good hair day, watch out, people. I can be kind of obnoxious. I'm cute for one day and I am running with it, right? So this guy thinks, you know, it's really interesting. He struggled with weight for 70 years, and he's momentarily 20 pounds away from his goal weight, and now he has become, you know, disgusted by having an obese who he really, really likes, right? So I think there's a little bit of an ego check. I mean, we do need to feel good about ourselves. You know, he should be proud of, you know, his accomplishment. But I think there what she's missing, and is the wrong way forward, is like, first of all, check yourself. And then number two, you know, those tactics never work, particularly something for weight, which has so much shame and embarrassment around it. Um, and there are so many terrible connotations that are affiliated with, you know, weight gain. You're lazy, you know, um, you know, you're not active, you don't care about your appearance, aesthetics aren't important. And all of that's incorrect. And so if he wants to be effective, first of all, check himself at the door. And then number two, do not use any of the tactics that he is gonna that are first coming to mind for him.

Justin Joseph 19:54

I also think what about? I mean, this is always a question do you communicate? And I'll never forget, you know. Gone through weight spirals, nothing drastic, but I've gone through race spirals. And I remember one day I this is probably five years ago, I had gone up in weighed, and I said to my girlfriend Kelly, Did have I gained weight? And she looked at me and said, You have. And I'll just never forget that. I appreciated the honesty. Um, and I know a lot of people wouldn't say that. You know, a lot of people like, Oh, you look great, you know. But the point is, is there is there I think effective communication and honest communication can take you a long way. And I think you could say and you could disagree to your to this person, you know, I have really gone on a health journey, I'm within 20 pounds of my goal weight, and I see myself as being with someone who also takes makes that a priority.

Speaker 1 20:40

Justin.

Katy Montgomery 20:43

Justin, no wrong way for it. First of all, you use this example with Kelly. The thing about it is you were empowered. You had the agency. You asked, you owned it and asked Kelly. You gave the answer. You knew the answer, right? This is different. He's going to her unsolicited. I think he instead says this kind of stuff. Look, you know, I'm I'm gonna go for a walk after dinner. I'd love to spend time with you. Would you like to walk with me? Or you know what? We're making dinner tonight. I know that it's a trigger for me to eat a cheeseburger. Are you okay if we have, you know, grilled salmon and some broccoli?

Justin Joseph 21:18

Oh, disagree, disagree, disagree. This we should have this A-block. People have to be all dropped off by the time we get to this disagreement. Um, I think you're wrong. You this person is living in the dark, and it's gonna be much more of a shock to them when he drops another 10 pounds and he's 10 from his goal weight and he says, two B's and he's out the door. But here's the thing bye bye.

Katy Montgomery 21:41

I got you. Bye-bye. But here's the thing, right? Is he says, I really want to be with her. It's just that she's obese. And if he's saying, I can't be with you because you're obese, that's fair, right? But if he wants to salvage the relationship and if he really loves her and really is infatuated with her, be kind and find another approach.

Justin Joseph 22:00

Well, I am all about being kind, but I am also about being honest. Like, I am not going to be here if this is not a priority for you. You don't have to say you're fat.

Katy Montgomery 22:09

Yeah, but Justin, here's the thing. You know, it's like he met her, he was with her. You know, it's I, you know, and here's the thing too. We also know that weight loss is fleeting. Today I read, um, I think it was maybe in the New York Times, that people on a GLP won the rest of their life. Yeah, gaining weight within the next two years. And we know it's we know it's a terrible

Partners, Boundaries, And Accountability

Katy Montgomery 22:30

kind of cycle. I just think that there's another way to kind of say this or to say, look, I've really enjoyed being lighter and feeling healthier. And I'm wondering if you want to kind of participate in this journey with me, you know. I I just don't think saying, you know, I mean, here's the thing. I can tell you what most people would do is they would get defensive and sad, and they would say, This person doesn't love me for who I really am, and they're gonna dig their feet in and like sabotage their own diet.

Justin Joseph 23:01

But isn't that true? This person doesn't love you for who you are, they love you for your personality, but they want that part of you in a different way. I mean, I just think that's the reality of life.

Speaker 1 23:10

I don't know.

Justin Joseph 23:11

I actually we've all been on both sides of that coin, so I'm not suggesting, you know. I mean, I have been told things like that before. I if I that I will think of something where someone has come up to me and said, this is not who I'm gonna be with.

Katy Montgomery 23:24

I don't know. I think, I mean, yes, I think there are some people like that. Again, this goes back to my concept of splitting. I think two things can be true at once, right? I love you, I care for you, I enjoy spending time with you, I wish you weren't a fat ass. You know, I I I think that's fine. I think if it's I don't want to be with you because you're a fat ass is a whole different thing. I mean, if we had a dollar for every couple that got married and then blew up in later life, but they stay together, I don't think anyone goes, you look extra hot with an extra 50 pounds, but I love you and I care for you, and I I understand how you got to this weight, and I'm not gonna dump your ass on the corner just because you put on some pounds. Well, let's do it. So, if you are the person who did it, it's probably not real love.

Justin Joseph 24:08

I agree, but let's take this up on the other side because I feel like we have a lot of unresolved things. So doggies may wait another week, but we'll be back on the other side of this. Okay. Thanks for streaming Wrong Way Forward, the weekly reminder that advice is usually free for a reason. We call out bad advice wherever it hides boardrooms, break rooms, and even book clubs.

Katy Montgomery 24:27

Enjoying this dumpster fire, like, subscribe, and check back every Thursday for new episodes. Want us to roast your favorite piece of nonsense? Email us at wrongwayforwardpodcast at gmail.com. Be sure to include your contact info. We're not psychic, just judgmental. And now back to Wrong Way Forward.

Speaker 24:46

Roasting the worst advice ever.

Katy Montgomery 24:48

Welcome back to the Katy and Justin. And we're back. Um, so Justin, I mean, you're trying to lose weight. We know you're married. I I I love your partner. Has this come up in your own life?

Justin Joseph 25:01

Well, it has only because, you know, when I met Josh, he was he Josh is seven years younger than me. And when I met him, I was in the best shape of my life. I worked out all the time. I had beautiful arms. Um and needless to say that, those are those all went away fast or quickly after, you know, once you get married, it that just all those things went go downhill. And weight, once I turned 45, I mean, the weight came on, and I, you know, I stopped going to the gym and all of that kind of stuff. Well, Josh has never gained a pound. He's always he's a good looking guy, he just doesn't gain weight like that. But he did say when his father hit 40, I think he said, or for or 50, that his father put on a lot of weight. And so Josh is kind of in that cycle now. He has passed 40 and he's you know, he can't just eat anything he wants uh without gaining weight. And so he one of his priorities this year was also to work on the weight thing. He has joined a gym again. But because he doesn't feel my urgency, because it's not just about vanity, it's not just about health, he's just kind of doing it with me. He doesn't take it probably as seriously as I do. An example, I called him the other day and I said, What did you have for lunch? And he said, Oh, I'm eating pizza. And I was like, Well, that's not really on our diet. And anyway, um But how did he respond to that? Huh? Well, he said I didn't want to leave it at home for you so that you ate it, which I thought was very nice.

Speaker 1 26:17

It's very nice. Josh, by the way, viewers and listeners, Josh is the nicest person. Like opposite of Justin.

Justin Joseph 26:27

Anyway, um, so you know, but now I'm at I mean we are doing meal prep and all that, and he did join a gym. But you know, it's like I I would never say to him, gosh, you've gained a lot of weight, and he he hasn't. So it's just it's it's in one of those things he knows I have, I know he has.

Katy Montgomery 26:41

But Justin, how would it, how would it feel to you if like I came into town and you know, we had a few cocktails and we had lunch and he came back and he said, you know what, Justin, it's you know, it's supposed to be dry spring. Um, it's light drinking spring, and you just had three cocktails at lunch, and we're still gonna go out to dinner. Why did you do that? Would you find that would that get on your nerves?

Justin Joseph 27:03

No, I think that would I've actually pushed him to take more initiative and on, you know, I mean, this, you know, he packs

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Justin Joseph 27:10

my pills for me.

unknown 27:12

Jeez.

Justin Joseph 27:14

I have a Sunday, Monday pill thing for my blood pressure, and now I'm on a statin, and good God. Anyway, you have a pill, a weekly pill thing too?

Katy Montgomery 27:22

I have a weekly pill thing, but it doesn't have things like statins and blood pressure, like old people medicine. It has like a crazy pill, and it has like for anxiety because it does exist and I have it. Um, and it's like a fiber pill and a multivitamin and a probiotic.

Justin Joseph 27:39

Well, yeah, my pills are actually necessary to live the next day.

Speaker 1 27:44

So you do need to be on a diet.

Justin Joseph 27:46

I do need to be on a diet. That's I told you. I really always had good blood work. And this last time I was like, okay, time to regroup.

Katy Montgomery 27:53

But she did say getting old is not easy. And that's and that's the thing that Josh is going through. It's like, I think there's a steep curve at 35, 40, 45, and then it's just downhill 50.

Justin Joseph 28:04

I agree at 50, but you know, 50, that was also so free because it's like, I don't care. Fuck it. But um, my mother said to me, Well, that's not fair to Josh if you really have that attitude. And I and I and she's right. But anyway, I have got on Josh about he just is not the type of guy. What were we just talking about the other day? And he's he um oh, he said, Well, that's not really my job to do that for you. And I was like, Yeah, okay, that's fair, it's not, but you know, yeah, okay.

Katy Montgomery 28:33

I think that's healthy boundaries, and I think that's also communication. Yeah, you want an ass rider, you want someone to call you out on your shit, you want someone to like make sure you're not doing this. He might not want that. And I think what happens is we don't have a really in-depth conversation about do you want this? Do you find this annoying? Is this helpful to you? Because what you're doing is you're projecting what you want on him 100%.

Justin Joseph 28:59

And the but the flip side of that is is he also, I'm not gonna be around forever if I don't get my act together. And you know, he's a part of that to some degree, and that's a that's its own conversation we've had.

Katy Montgomery 29:10

But that's my point is he can he can be on you, but if you know, because you want it, you need it, and you know, and you've asked for it. But he I don't know if he's asked the same from you. Yeah.

Justin Joseph 29:21

Yikes. Um, okay. Well, this was a fun block C. All right. So what do we have coming up in the next couple of weeks, Katy? What do we have got going on wrongly forward?

Katy Montgomery 29:32

Oh my gosh, we have so many ideas and so many suggestions. And Justin and I have kind of a working kind of document, and it's just, you know, pages and links. So we've got a lot of good content coming up. But of course, just to remind all of our viewers and listeners, we do love when you write in or you send us messages because we love to work with kind of your real world stuff and tell you why it's the wrong way forward. Um, so remember you can always email us at wrongwayforward podcast at gmail.com. You can also

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Katy Montgomery 30:05

find us on our social media and leave us a message. And then Justin, do you also want to share our text line?

Justin Joseph 30:11

Uh yeah, I don't have my text line in front of me. It's 720-251-4450. That's 720-251-4450. Um, we were going to talk about dog issues today. We have a uh a fun topic we'll take up next time. A woman um she went in to adopt a dog and they told her she was too old. So we'll talk about that. I will introduce Preston, who is behind me in silence, which is wonderful.

Katy Montgomery 30:34

And for the for our listeners, could you please spell the word Preston?

Justin Joseph 30:38

And Katy hates any any non-traditional spelling of anything, and it's not Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John. Um, Preston is with a T Y N, and that's because she's female. Um anyway, um, so we'll meet her next time, and then we're gonna talk. I also want to talk about Kim Kardashian gifting her four kids Pomeranian puppies gross.

Katy Montgomery 30:58

That and I think we're gonna talk about, you know, are we ever possibly Karen's?

Justin Joseph 31:04

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That we've got a good uh feed on in my mind.

Katy Montgomery 31:08

Yeah, so we'd love to hear if you ever feel like you've accidentally or intentionally pulled a Karen.

Justin Joseph 31:15

Me? Never. All right, we'll talk to you next week on Wrong Way Forward. Thanks, everybody. All right, that's a wrap on this week's episode of Wrong Way Forward. Remember, the only thing worse than taking bad advice is giving it.

Katy Montgomery 31:28

If you've liked what you've heard, like, subscribe, or follow us wherever you stream podcasts. And if you've got a topic or need some advice, we'll probably regret giving, email us at wrongwayforwardpodcast at gmail.com.

Justin Joseph 31:41

Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Wrong Way Forward.